Photo Credit: Rsms/Creative Commons
In my recent post 10 Ways to Love on a Writer I offered ways we could support literary creatives.
Today’s post is a tongue-in-cheek opposite filled with some additional truths (in a lighthearted manner).
HOW TO SCORE BROWNIE POINTS:
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Phone calls promising “This will only take five minutes…” (And of course, it’s more like 50.)
- Well-meaning remarks such as “Must be nice not having a schedule.” Huh?
- Additional head-scratchers: “How much do you make?” AND “Wow! Can I see your agency contract?” My answers: “Would you mind sharing what your salary is?” and “No, you may not. My agency contract is a confidential, legally binding document. If I show it to you, my face will turn blue and my toes will fall off.”
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Ask what writers write. And then diss the genre. Unabashedly.
- Inform your writer friends that you, too, are thinking about writing “a little book.” PLEASE do it already.
- Use incorrect grammar. (Don’t be surprised if you hear our teeth grate.)
- Drop in for an impromptu visit during our work hours. And be sure and bring your sick children.
- Attempt a guilt trip when we politely say “No thank you. I’ll have to pass.” Guilt doesn’t work with me. Chocolate. Try chocolate.
- Deliver negativity and pass out the complaints. Nothing spells r-u-n faster than melodramatic mindsets. Legitimate concerns are one thing; contrived “poor me’s” and dissing not so much.
- Show us your handwritten manuscript. All 500 pages. And then ask, “Will you help me publish it?” Really?? A) I’m not a publishing house. B) Please learn to type. C) Levity is always appreciated. Thank you.
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What else would you add to this list?
Have you ever faced an awkward situation in the workplace?
How did you handle it?
Additional posts you might like:
On This Business (And Busyness of Writing)
How to Stay Motivated Despite Chronic Complainers
How to Defy Our Dream-Crushers
Photo Credit: Rsms/Creative Commons
Blessings Always,
Comments 6
I got a message the other day from someone I have not spoken to in at least 20 years with a hey good job on writing your book. I’m thinking of writing a novel. Who’s looking for manuscripts.
For. The. Love.
lol Bad grammar doesn’t drive me too crazy. It helps me when I’m writing characters. 😉
I would so toilet paper a desk.
Author
Jess, you made me laugh! Somehow, I did think of you when I chose today’s blog photo. 😉
Wow. I think your example of “don’ts” topped mine. Priceless.
My nephew had been out of the country when I finally landed an agent earlier this year. Apparently, some equate getting an agent equals getting a book deal all in one. So this summer, on my facebook he writes, “I’m going to be back in the states, where can I get a copy of your book? I would love to read it.”
Ummm. I haven’t sold it yet. My agent is shopping it.
“Bummer”
LOL! true story.
Author
Loree, LOL’ing with you! Ahhh, fact IS stranger than fiction sometimes. And funnier.
Love the image! (Glad it’s not my desk)
Author
Patti, you echoed what I thought when I selected this one for my post.