Today I wanted to tackle a subject that’s almost a non-issue in the general fiction market today: intimate relationships outside of marriage.
One quick click-through our television channels and we’ve no doubt what grabs the highest ratings.
It’s everywhere.
From the popular tween series to adult nighttime soap operas, the sanctity of marriage and all that it stands for is sorely tested, and sometimes, blatantly scoffed at. And some of the made-for-T.V. movies that DO portray couples in loving, committed relationships tend to miss the mark with their convoluted themes of passion versus love versus mixed messages versus idealistic marital bliss. In other words, our views become skewed because television convinces us that this is real life.
A brief perusal in the general fiction section of today’s bookstores offers a glimpse of what sells, too. I’m particularly shocked (and concerned) by what’s peddled to our teenagers now. I’ve picked up books that I barely thought were appropriate for 18-year-olds, much less the 12 to 16-year-old age range. Outside of the fact that many of the books are profanity-laced, there’s also the weighty issue of premarital sex, hidden agendas, and lack of accountability that are disturbing.
The adult section of some bookstores also mystifies. It’s clear that as Christian fiction authors we have our work cut out for us when competing with some of the general market’s hot titles. (Pun intended.)
We must be bold without being too brash. We must illicit emotion without using empty words. We must depict love, romance, and desire as Christ intended without misrepresenting our genre.
I believe what draws me to Christian fiction, specifically inspirational romance, is the desire to deal with worldly topics and taboo trends from a biblical perspective. It’s important we portray real life, but from a “What would Jesus do?” mindset.
Obviously, as a woman and as an inspirational romance novelist, romance, passion, and marriage rank high on my rating scale. I believe in Christian fiction, we can show real life, but the in-your-face imagery that other venues would endorse is simply not necessary.
In my earlier posts, Stuck on You and Staying Christ-focused While Keeping it Real: Love Scenes in Faith-based Romance, I delved a little further into why I write what I do and what I regard as my personal philosophy when choosing specific scenes in my novels.
As I’ve said before, inspirational romance novelists are not prudes. We understand that temptation is a very real aspect of a budding relationship. We adore gallantry, a gentle (and sometimes even a passionate) embrace, a tender kiss, a soulful glance, and obviously, physical attraction.
How far, then, should (unmarried) couples go in Christian fiction?
- Tea in the kitchen? Yes.
- A little sugar in the bedroom? No.
- A stroll in the moonlight? How romantic!
- A camp-out beneath the stars? Best not.
- Quiet conversation on the sofa? Safe.
- A slumber party on the living room floor? Unwise.
- Handholding. Yep. Kissing. Yep. (Within CBA guidelines.)
- Lovemaking? Absolutely not. *And a brief mention here* For those couples who’ve had intimate encounters prior to knowing Christ as their personal Savior, it’s not necessary that the reader know the entire past history. What’s important now: Have the individuals turned from their past and committed to living for Christ from that point on?
We are passionate people, created by a passionate God. His desire is for us is to be passionate about Him first, and all others, second. When we’re Christ-focused, our portrayal of couples’ relationships, within Christian fiction, is not just about the physical element, but about the couple’s spiritual connection, as well.
And we can tell it like it is, without the “it” being the sole focus.
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Excellent Resources:
For those of you who are Karen Kingsbury fans, then you know she writes Life-Changing Fiction. Her stories are prime examples of broken people who’ve been mended by God. They’ve known temptations and have dealt with the fall-out from poor choices. Her work is Christian fiction at its finest.
Julie Lessman is an inspirational romance author I had the pleasure of hearing speak at last year’s American Christian Fiction Writer’s (ACFW) conference. She and inspirational romance author, Ruth Axtell Morren, presented the fabulous workshop A Kiss Is Not Just a Kiss. There were so many great points from their workshop, but the one that resonated with me was this: Passion without love is lust.
Of Interest and Someone to Watch:
For those needing a dose of encouragement (and particularly for those who are single and still searching for Mr. or Mrs. Right) newlywed Ruthie Dean blogs about love, dating, relationships, and marriage. On her blog, she shares openly about life before and after marriage. She encourages young people not to settle for anything less than God’s best in a future mate. (Wednesday’s blog post was especially poignant.)
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What additional points would you add to the no-no list above?
Do you feel that physical temptation is integral to the plot in inspirational romance?
Photo Credit: photostock/FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Blessings Always,
Comments 4
I think any intimate scenes need to take place off camera so to speak. I have characters that fall into temptation and mess up and they’re Christians, but I do not glorify this. It’s something a reader needs to see in order to realize, yep consequences and forgiveness come. Mess ups happen. But there is hope for sin. And I have characters that are not Christians and the reader clearly knows what they are engaging in without me having to write an erotica scene. Mostly it comes through dialogue. I love Julie Lessman’s books! I agree is kiss is not just a kiss! Great post today!!
Author
Jess, as you said, “Mess-ups happen.” Love that!
And I wanted to clarify for others who may misconstrue my point, there IS redemption and forgiveness when believers sin and have repentent hearts. To portray sin, be it in a pre-marital or extra-marital relationship, without showing the redemptive value would be glorification of such acts. As Christian fiction writers, I do think we need to step out of our comfort zones and not be afraid to tackle the tough subjects, but from a Christ-like perspective.
You hit the nail on the head. Erotic scenes are totally inappropriate in Christian fiction. What I liked about Julie and Ruth’s workshop is their descriptive take on romantic passion within our writing, influenced by the very Author of passion. As these pros pointed out, the use of emotionally-charged dialogue goes a long way.
Good post. Ideas vary greatly about acceptable levels of intimacy in Christian fiction. There’s definitely a gap between no-holds-barred in bedrooms and avoiding the topic altogether.
I appreciate Christian fiction that alludes to the good/bad things that happen in relationships, without going into graphic detail. I sort of wish Christian fiction would address more intimacy issues, since that’s at the heart of many real marriage problems. But I think it’s something each Christian has to pray about as he/she writes.
The Bible dealt with many sexual encounters, some of which were downright shocking, but it did it without being graphic. That’s what I strive for–being real but not portraying all the graphic details. Sometimes, descriptions of a kiss can be even more titillating than an allusion to sex/rape.
Enjoyed your post!
Author
Heather, the Bible absolutely addresses most, if not all, of the issues we can think of, including romance (passion), purity, sexual boundaries, marriage, and so much more.
I believe all authors are gifted with their own unique talents, and we must be committed to telling the stories that Christ lays upon our hearts. I think, too, that we need not shy away from issues that should be addressed, but that we should do so with integrity in a Christ-like fashion.
Graphic details, like you said, aren’t necessary to depict specific scenes within a novel. Words and appropriate use of description can paint a picture much more effectively than the mention of body parts or vivid intimate encounters.
Great comments! Thanks so much for visiting!