While growing up, one of the phrases I seemed to remember the most was “Don’t burn your bridges.”
Uttered in stern admonition with an almost Sunday morning reverence, those words seemed to roll off people’s tongues easier than any other piece of advice.
I discovered the general meaning associated with those words early in life, and I took them to heart, lest I make an unforgivable faux pas.
Bridge burning didn’t denote fun or party time. On the contrary. I knew it was an act of finality and that it often involved anger, suffering, embarrassment, and bitterness.
What was true then is true now.
Striking a match to our bridge can be an intentional decision or a spur-of-the-moment regret.
One example may seem more tasteful to the palate than the other, but both eventually produce the same result: heartache.
I’m reminded of this when a post or tweet goes viral and a firestorm of bad press ensues.
I wonder what on earth Donnie Joe was thinking when he said Sally Sue had three eyes?
What did Sally Sue expect when she told the world about Donnie Joe’s brownie addiction?
Or…more importantly…didn’t Sally Sue and Donnie Joe realize that they shouldn’t yell at their pet rock in public?
All joking aside, when emotions are high, that’s the absolute worst time to strike out, cut off, or go for a match.
The temptation might be great. The journey may be intense. We may want nothing more than to excise the other party/situation from our lives thinking that will eliminate the pain.
The truth of the matter is, many times, our bridges continue to smolder even after they’ve burned.
Why is that?
Could it be because of that still small voice–the same voice of conviction that seamlessly meshes the tangible with the intangible?
I wonder.
I pray I never burn a bridge… But if I’m tempted, I hope someone will offer me the hose before the flames consume me.
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How does today’s sense of entitlement affect our moral compasses?
Under what circumstances, if any, would “bridge burning” be appropriate?
Photo Credit: 9comeback/FreeDigitalPhotos.net
Blessings Always,
Comments 6
I always took not burning bridges to mean go out on a high note, end classy and on good terms. That just sounds like the responsible thing to do.
I always keep a hose handy. Just in case! 🙂
Author
Jess, great take and good idea about the hose!
This is a great post, Cynthia.
This is something I taught my kids right off the bat as a life rule. I’m one who does not like to burn bridges. I had regrettably burned a few in my younger years. Fortunately, we learn from out mistakes.
Author
Loree, I think we’ve all made our fair share of mistakes. Learning from them matures us.
Building bridges is certainly better than burning ’em! 🙂
We might need to go back the way we came, so bridges should be left intact. Even harmful relationships should end on a good note,if possible, leaving one with peace rather than trepidation.
Author
Patti, that’s great insight! Harboring ill will can only continue to fester.
In some situations, I realize more drastic measures may be necessary so I was speaking in generalities to some degree.